Monday, August 3, 2009

ladyboy massages

hilarious story from last night-

so we're walking around at night in phi phi, whatever. just got done w/ dinner, a massage sounds nice. my friend and i walk to a nearby parlor for some nice $7 massages.

anyways, i'm greeted by my suspected masseuse, clearly a ladyboy. for those who dont know, ladyboys are dudes who have been injected with estrogen from a young age and LOOK mostly like chicks, except they have dicks. and sometimes, they dont look like chicks at all.

so right now, i'm squriming, thinking about this dude putting his hands all over me. one thing that could be beneficial is that the ladyboy might have stronger hands...i guess. my friend is laughing his ass off and saying "this will be enjoyable". i tell him to go **** himself.

the ladyboy walks over and starts to massage him instead (LOL). i am fistpumping alot in my head and i get this old lady. fine with me, at least i dont have this mutant touching me.

anyways, i enjoy watching my friend squirm as this thing is grabbing him all over the place. i'm laughing my ass off and enjoying the experience. the thing was clearly powerful, it had gigantic banana hands and large feet.

so after we decide to leave and get anohter massage, only this time, only vagina behind us. friend agrees fully.

so we go to another parlor. we go in and mine is clearly a woman, his looks like a woman (but it's dark). we are getting massages, all is well. mine is pretty ****ing big (fat) and having her on my back felt like a ****ing 1000000 pound slab crushing my vertebrae.

so we all start to chat it up since we're right next to each other. she asks the usual bull ****, how long you in thailand, etc. they say i look thai and i tell them i'm chinese. they mention how i'm just as dark/darker than them and i shrug.

so anyways, i point to my friend and was like "he got massage from ladyboy"
my masseuse starts to laugh. "right now?"
"no, before...right before this"
"oh...you like ladyboy?"
"nah not really"

friend starts to laugh. i notice that friend's masseuse grows quiet. my masseuse laughs.

its dark. i start to stare at my friend's masseuse...something just isnt right. the face is chick but something...is not right. her shoulders are ****ing broad, her feet are ****ing apelike. i realize that my friend is getting massaged by a ladyboy YET AGAIN. upon this realization i start to laugh inside...my smile going ear to ear and i'm making small sniffling noises. my friend looks over at me and stares me in the eyes, saying "i hate you so very much right now...i hate you"

ill get pics later of said ladyboys. ahahhahahaha

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hahaha quality post. Your mate will be the laughing stock for years to come, even more so if these pictures show "she" was a real beast!