live poker lol god i suck

k so i decided to play live again. BIG ****ING MISTAKE DAVE

live roll is a ****ing joke, as stated earlier. im going to have to withdraw from bank acct to replenish my depleted roll. oh well, at least i can claim some losses on poker winnings/not pay as much taxes!!!

anyways, i decide to play 1/3. i build my stack off early , win a few smallish pots.

i lose 50bbs to some retard wearing an eastern carolina hoodie who l/c pf with 65o and flops 354ss (i had TT and just raised him all in). he slowly donates the rest away while blabbering about how he lost a $900 pot w/ KK vs. AA. news flash- if you get in KK pf w/ like almost 200bbs live , you're ****ed.

i get bored as ****...start to bluff. some meth hag raises utg, i call Q9o otb.

flop KT4 she c/c my bet. turn 8 she c/c again. after i bet the turn i'm like hmm well whatever time to 3-barrel i guess...i'm bored as **** anyways. river is an A and she checks. this braindead whore would probably c/c QJ all the way but whatever...i should have just shipped it but i stupidly bet like $80 instead...she tanks forever and calls KJ, hi fiving some *** next to her when i muck.

i'm bored as **** by this time. eastern carolina minraises utg, this has indicated Axs/pp/sc about 90% of the time (when he shows this down...he miniraises frequently). i rr A9o, meth hag cold calls, eastern carolina folds. flop Q77ss i bet 1/2 pot, she miniraises, i fold, she shows AQ and says "I HAD TA CAWL YUK YUK". god i hope she chokes on a big black dick.

a literal retard sat down at my table, and since it's not nice to make fun of them i'll hold myself. i m not sure what disorder he had but something wasn't right..he kept spazzing out, and twitching.

so i'm like down a few hundo at htis point and im just like **** this **** im going to go play at the 2/5. normally id like to exercise some bankroll management and before, the 2/5 game was megafull...but the night has died down and i notice that they are short handed. the game looks pretty good, a bunchve old retards, a few azns.

i sit and everyone has big stacks, we're short handed, and i'm sitting with a bunchve tards. i'm like



too bad i was naive.

right off the bat i get KJhh some tightwad young gun dbag raises, few call, i call. flop Q94 i check, some crazy jap bets, i c/r. he tanks and folds.

very next hand some hillbilly opens btn, i 3-bet QQ. he has like $150 back, he calls. flop KA9r i c/f when he jams, he shows AK and says "i got lucky". i told him he could have jammed pf and taken the rest of my money.

crazy azns sit both to my left. one was actually good, definitely in alot of ways that cant really be quantified by online standards. live players generally do some pretty bad fundamental ****, but it definitely works in a live setting.

crazy viet to my direct left starts chatting about how crazy loose i am. i say i'm on a heater...he 3-bets my UTG open with 22, i fold A2ss. lol...

not a tremendous amount of 'interesting' hands. mainly just me splashing around.

i open 34 in co, crazy viet calls otb. flop A65r, i bet, he calls. turn 3, i bet again, he calls. i could have c/c-ed i suppose but meh. river J, i check, he bets like $75 into $180, i'm like ugh...hmmm...he chats about how much i'll call...then i fold, he proudly shows 78. i knock the table and maybe second guess myself.

i witness a hand where its a limped pot. (lol)...flop 963...theres a bet, call, shorty c/jams...the crazy viet calls the shove, and the cold caller makes it $130 on top. crazy viet tanks and calls the $130..turn is 2, crazy viet insta bets $200 (nearly putting the cold caller ai), the cold caller calls with a set, river bricks...crazy viet shows Q4 and the shorty has A8 (other guy had a set).

by this time we're like 5 handed. i can't do a ton w/ crazy viet behind me...at least not w/o cards. we don't play much longer...the solid nittish young dude realizes he can't play in this game when he gets owned by the viet...i open 77, viet calls, young dude squeezes really small (i opened $15, viet called, young dude made it $50), we both call.

flop AQ8dd im pretty much done, young dude cks, i ck, viet cks

turn Q we both check to viet, who bets, young dude calls...i assume w/ some Ax or something...i fold pretty quick.

river T young dude cks, viet bets like $150 instantly, young dude folds and viet shows T9. young dude says one more round and then leaves.

donky shorty from other Q4/A8 hand is only one left, along w/ me and the crazy viet. i ask donky shorty if he wants to flip for his remaining $80...he says no. it took him ****ing 5 minutes to understand wtf i was trying to say to begin with, ****ing moron lol.

anyways, my friend who i went w/ made like $500. i ended down a few hundred on the night, pretty bad. i'm getting pretty cold cards overall, not really giving me much to work with. if i played longer i'm sure i could do better, but we'll see. i'm prob just going to have to withdraw some $ to feel more comfortable. lol live poker and LOL at me for sucking dick.

anyways, i saw three movies today...just stayed in a theater and watched angels and demons, wolverine, and terminator: salvation.

all were pretty average, nothing special, nothing horrendous. each were decent in its own manner, probably all worth a watch at one point or another (though i'd probably only watch all once). meh.